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January 23, 2013

Remember that scene in Forest Gump when Jenny leaves him after they spent the night together? Remember how the next day was when he started running back and forth across the country? I feel like I need to do that. I feel like I need to get up, go out and start walking. Not to get to any particular point, but to clear my head, which is exactly what I think Forrest was doing. I feel like I need answers to questions and I feel like I have things I need to think though.

I’m a list maker. Sometimes I sort my feeling out on paper and then I can properly sort though where I need to start and how to go about mending myself. Not that I am broken, but I cant get past this feeling of being overwhelmed by my own BS. I feel like there is much to do and I can’t get out of my own way long enough to make something happen. The house needs to cleaned, my closet needs to be organized, I have to do my tax prep work (which I am dreading), I need to , I have to, I must do. Ugh. The list goes on. All this while trying to take care of my own well being, which seems pushed aside this month.

CC is going out of town this weekend for a coaches clinic, I am grateful. That might sound awful, but I need this weekend to sort out my brain and get some work done. I want to make pasta all weekend and drink wine while I put away laundry and clean up. Sounds crazy, but I am looking forward to it. I have an easy Friday and I actually have no clients this Saturday, which may not change because I am not actively trying to get the day booked. I have a lunch date with a girl friend Saturday afternoon, but that’s it. Loads of time to get work done and to find some sanity for myself. It would be nice to also take a long walk. Get out of my head for a bit and spend sometime outside. Let my feeling and brain wander and see if I can fix any of this confused mess up. This is one of those moments where I miss my old apartment. I lived in a neighborhood with sidewalks everywhere so I could easily go on a two hour walk and not worry about my safety. I guess I could always drive out that way and walk around. The local community college out that way is good for that too. Its quite and has a beautiful nature trail that is a lovely walk. The weather is supposed to be good. I will be productive this weekend.


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